Vested Interest [Part 1]

...maybe it's why we are still attached somehow? I've been attached to you since ever... Maybe not consciously but definitely every now and then I think of you and miss you and wish things were different. What I'm saying is, we owe it to ourselves to fulfill this.

But then what? You'll leave and we break up and you want me to go through that again?

Then we see how we feel... I'll leave that's for sure, we don't have to break up. We can have this thing going on for years without any problems.

I can't do the long distance thing.

I think we can have what Facebook calls an open relationship.

I don't think I can handle that.

I don't expect you to.

She just couldn't take it anymore. He was toying around with her emotions, being too much of a coward to say what he really wanted. She lost it.

Then what are you expecting? What do you want to do? What is asked of me? I don't understand what you want and how you want us to do this. I want to act on instinct and follow my heart but I can't. You know exactly how I feel.

I don't know either.

This is getting nowhere. How about we talk this later? I'm just not feeling up for this, too sleepy.

She left it at that. She couldn't bear to be anymore vulnerable than she already was. She could feel the tears staining her cheeks.

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...I have to think about this. I mean I'll see you as what? That's the question. What are we?

Don't think about that. It's easier if you don't.

I have to.

No you don't. You can just forget about it.

I don't want to get hurt. What about when you leave, I don't want to go through that again...

Neither do I.

Then what?

I don't know. It will figure itself out. Listen don't think too hard about it because thinking too deep into anything will eventually ruin it and sometimes you just have to follow your intuition. Sometimes you have to follow your heart...

I don't know...

Anyway you know that you can always come to me as a friend even if you don't want to come to me as my girl... You will always have at least a friend in me.

This sucks.

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Sitting around a fire in a big tent-like room full of women constantly chattering about one thing or the other. Coffee, chocolate and sweets are being passed around. Talk gets interrupted with a laugh, maybe a couple of giggles...

She sighed and looked at the time, 10.35 PM. I want to go home! Her aunt was next to her and according to the expression on her face, she wasn't at all pleased where she was. "Let's go wash up or something." Immediately getting up, her phone rings. Her aunt gives her a look that she doesn't notice.

Y is calling...

She gets up and leaves the tent, hearing the dull clickety-clack of her grey suede boots against the pavement. She answers him while making her way to the playground. After the small-talk, he asked if she was busy. 

No, I was looking for an excuse to leave. I needed a break.

You make it sound like it's work, to take a break from it!

Believe me, it is.

Awkward silence...

So uh why'd you call me?

Immediately after saying it she regretted it. She wasn't a very tactful person.

Ouch! Can't I say hi to you?

It's not that...

I just wanted to say hi.

Awkward silence. She looked at her reflection in the glass doors of an empty room. Long black sweater, tight purple skinny jeans... She sat down on one of the empty swings.

Ummm so I'm hoping you don't always go out two nights in a row...

Getting to the point? Took you long enough.

Actually, I have this thing tomorrow. Look, I have to go. We'll talk about this later, yeah?

Okay okay bye.

I'll deal with this later.

She took a deep breath and got up from the swings. While walking to the tent, she wondered if they were done discussing Flana's engagement.